Clean Jokes

Sam: Would you punish me for some thing i didn’t do?
Teacher: no, of course not.
Sam: good, because i didn’t do my homework.

Man wears underwear under the trouser and superman wears it over the trouser.

Doctor! I have a serious problem, I can never remember what i just said.
When did you first notice this problem?
What problem?

Last night I went to a 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, “Hey, the sign says you’re open 24 hours.” He goes: “Not in a row!” (Steven Wright)

They say animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before that last earthquake hit, our family dog took the car keys and drove to Arizona. (Bob Hope/Gene Perret)